Zombie Jesus - He died for your sins... then He came back for your brains!
Give me McLiberty or give me McDeath.
Don't shoot! I'm just here to buy some crack.
"When the President does it, that means it's not illegal." - Richard Nixon
The Gays are coming! The Gays are coming!
Smoking marijuana causes a shortened... I like potato chips.
Don't hate me because I'm beautiful. Hate me because I'm a bitch.
Rolling Hard with Mercedes - imported from Amsterdam, 100% pure.
Ibiza - Like Heaven, but without all the Christians
Smile! if you have a small penis.
I'm not going to start killing people
No, I'm not going to kill myself, and no, this isn't a cry for help.
Alcoholics Unanimous - changing lives... one beer at a time
Drunk fish with green shoes singing "Joy to the World" on karaoke night.
Everyone is entitled to my own opinion.
Vampire Jesus - He gave His blood, now He wants it back
Home is where you hide the bodies.
I cried because I had no shoes, (etc)
I'm the one who ate the brown acid.
It is no longer safe to turn off your computer.
I am a unique snowflake. So go fuck yourself.
I woke up on the wrong side of the coffin.
I keeps it realer than a mofo.
Jesus Saves - at Chico's Discount Grocery.
I'm a good person - I just enjoy torturing small fuzzy kittens.
Life's a bitch - and then you burn in Hell for eternity.
I'm high on life - and by "life" I mean drugs.
I'm sorry, I don't know any better.
Give me liberty or give me slack
You may think she's just your gal... (etc)
Sunshine on my shoulder makes me horny.
I put on my pants both legs at a time.
Are you in any way affiliated with any law enforcement agency?
I love vegetarians. They taste like chicken.
Relax - I've been rehabilitated.
It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
D.A.R.E. to kiss my pot smoking ass.
I've done all I can do. It's up to the beer now.
God Bless America! (made in China)
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